Some moments are so vivid that no dry erase marker could ever erase the smiles on your faces. Meeting R was one of those moments.
He is a linguist, a researcher, who does similar work to me though in a different sector, a master of many languages and he brought all of that with him into the room. His speech bubbled out in bursts, switching between languages with accents that were both perfectly executed and completely endearing. I couldn’t stop laughing, not just at the cleverness, but because the joy he radiated was infectious. Every sentence, every accent, every playful digression felt like a private comedy show just for me.
And then there was the touch. R is so kinaesthetic and the kind of person where being near each other isn’t enough. Fingers brushing fingertips, the hand lightly touching my forearm to emphasise a point, sitting close enough that our thighs touched. Those small gestures that were electric, grounding and completely playful. The chemistry was combustible and it didn’t need words to prove itself.
R and I share the same NLP representational systems of AD and K. He spoke in bursts of structured, content-rich language of the kind my AD brain loves while his gestures, expressions and gentle touches added kinaesthetic layers that made the moment feel alive. Every laugh, every fingertip brush, every playful gesture felt like perfect translation between two brains operating on the same wavelength.
Through my Autistic lens, every detail mattered. The tone of his voice, the rhythm of his laughter, the warmth in his gestures all communicated honesty, care, and delight. I didn’t have to decode; he was already being clear, playful, and fully present.
And yet, it was the simple things that struck me most. The smiles that wouldn’t leave our faces. The shared laughter. The sense of curiousity and presence that made the universe’s delays and almosts fade away. In that moment, there was no past frustration of past delayed trains only the joy of being together.
Meeting R reminded me why anticipation can be as thrilling as the meeting itself. Why connection isn’t just about schedules lining up or about the perfect first impression but about the energy, humour, presence and those little electrifying touches two people bring into a space together.
Meeting R reminded me why chemistry is more than words. It’s the energy two people create together, the humour, the curiousity, the playful touches and the feeling of being completely aligned.
And that energy? Unforgettable.
Self-Reflection Questions
1. How do I notice and savour moments of joy, presence, and tactile connection in new relationships?
2. What role does humour and physical closeness play in making me feel safe and engaged?
3. How do I recognise when someone’s words, gestures, and presence are aligned?
4. How does anticipation change the way I experience the first meeting?
About the Author
Monique is an Autistic advocate, NLP practitioner exploring the messy, funny, and joyful world of dating and connection. Herblog blends humour, honesty, and lived experience to unpack love, communication, and the subtle chemistry of human connection.